The Code

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  1. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:25

    You take that overwhelming energy; that will to dance;
    that unstoppable force that moves you and makes you tap
    your feet uncontrollably at low doses and lose four liters
    of sweat to the dancerush at high doses. You take that,
    and you direct it inward. You do not let your body move.
    You sit perfectly still in a half-Lotus and keep your
    muscles attentive but relaxed. You let the music and its
    energy wash over and through the physical sphere, which
    forces it to move inward, to your mental sphere. Because
    it has to jack something.

    This is the first stage of transcendence, and where most
    people stop if they get this far. That energy, that
    fucking awesome force that can make a thin, weak asthmatic
    stomp his ass off for six hours straight, jacks your mental
    sphere instead. You think harder and longer and clearer and
    stronger than you ever have before. You’re in charge of your
    mind like an autistic hacker’s in charge of his computer.

    And most people stop at this point because they don’t know
    about their spiritual sphere, or don’t believe in it, or most
    commonly, they’re so massively overwhelmed by their ability to
    think clearly for the first time that they have a whole lot of
    shit to take care of with their lives. Definitely useful.
    Definitely worth exploring and developing. But. Clear your mind.
    Relax it like you relaxed your muscles. Attentive but relaxed.
    Refuse the music access to your mental sphere by paralyzing your
    intellect as well. That fucking awesome force will then jack
    your soul. And this is fresh. If your warrior-spirit had a golden
    spine, you’d be plugging it into the Hoover Dam.

    You can read everything the bodhisattvas ever said about what it’s
    like to be enlightened, and think, “That’s absolutely true, but
    they describe it so anemic, so dull.” Our language just doesn’t
    have the nomenclature to describe spiritual experiences, since
    most people have never really had one. And this state of existence,
    with a techno-monk jacking your soul, is where Talia’s at every
    single day, making her a black sheep and an urban legend among
    Teedot’s spiritual communities.

  2. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:29

    …nobody knows your answer, nobody will answer you. You can search…

  3. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:29

    There is no one perfect way to truth for all of
    mankind, for each must create his or her own path.

  4. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:29

    I dreamed I had an interview with God.

    “So you would like to interview me?” God asked.

    “If you have the time” I said.

    God smiled. “My time is eternity.”
    “What questions do you have in mind for me?”

    “What surprises you most about humankind?”

    God answered…
    “That they get bored with childhood,
    they rush to grow up, and then
    long to be children again.”

    “That they lose their health to make money…
    and then lose their money to restore their health.”

    “That by thinking anxiously about the future,
    they forget the present,
    such that they live in neither
    the present nor the future.”

    “That they live as if they will never die,
    and die as though they had never lived.”

    God’s hand took mine
    and we were silent for a while.

    And then I asked…
    “As a parent, what are some of life’s lessons
    you want your children to learn?”

    “To learn they cannot make anyone
    love them. All they can do
    is let themselves be loved.”

    “To learn that it is not good
    to compare themselves to others.”

    “To learn to forgive
    by practicing forgiveness.”

    “To learn that it only takes a few seconds
    to open profound wounds in those they love,
    and it can take many years to heal them.”

    “To learn that a rich person
    is not one who has the most,
    but is one who needs the least.”

    “To learn that there are people
    who love them dearly,
    but simply have not yet learned
    how to express or show their feelings.”

    “To learn that two people can
    look at the same thing
    and see it differently.”

    “To learn that it is not enough that they
    forgive one another, but they must also forgive themselves.”

    “Thank you for your time,” I said humbly.

    “Is there anything else
    you would like your children to know?”

    God smiled and said,
    “Just know that I am here… always.”

  5. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:30

    – ALLOWANCE –

    Allowance is the “key” to the kingdom
    It is the “way”, the means
    To undo the world of the insane
    That you have simply made in error

    By practicing allowance
    By making a choice to surrender
    FOR THAT CHOICE
    Must be made first
    Let me say that by that choice
    You “open the door” to the truth
    Of life
    The Real world versus the unreal world
    It is not a choice to be made lightly
    For in that choice
    You are saying to the Universe
    You are saying “yes” to all of creation
    You will literally leave “time” in a sense
    And all of creation
    Which in truth is “neutral”
    All of it takes on a new purpose
    And its purpose once that choice has been made
    Is to AWAKEN YOU
    ALL OF CREATION WILL REPLY
    WILL REFLECT
    Your choice

    Allowance in every moment
    Is a choice
    To see all things as perfect
    To allow your every day moments
    To be allowed
    To pay attention in your now moments
    To that which is in front of you
    For once this choice is made
    All, all that is front of you NOW
    will be there
    To teach you, to nudge you
    To retrain your mind
    And in the practice of allowance
    You begin to “see”
    With New Eyes
    You begin to see the beautiful
    Dance that is truly going on within
    Creation in ALL MOMENTS

    So, lesson one
    ALLOW ALL THINGS
    Do this practice for 30 days
    For the next 30 days just allow
    ALL THINGS

    Notice them, pay attention
    Rather they seem to be
    “good” or “bad”
    Makes NO Difference
    For all of creation is neutral
    And all of it has a purpose
    And by making this choice
    You have literally said to creation
    TEACH ME ANEW

    So, enjoy these next 30 days
    Of allowance
    There will be many treasures
    There for YOU
    Peace be with you
    You are loved sooooooooo

  6. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:31

    Behold, we know not anything;
    I can but trust that good shall fall
    At last — far off — at last, to all,
    And every winter change to spring.

  7. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:32

    “I am grateful for the abundance in my life.”

    “As I release the old, I welcome the new.”

    “Love floods my Being, opening my heart to the fullness of giving and receiving.”

    “I am learning love and acceptance.”

    “As my power builds, I use it for the highest good of all.”

    “Peace fills my Soul. Love and harmony flow through my life.”

    “I am expanding my perceptions.”

    “I open to the peaceful calm within me.”

    “My heart welcomes the comfort that healing brings.”

    “I am One with the Love and Light of Spirit.”

    “I believe in my ability to move from the shadow of the past into the Light of a new day.”

    “As I release the burdens, I surrender to a feeling of well-being.”

    “I am whole and balanced on every level.”

    “My emotional boundaries are healthy and strong. I have a strong foundation of self-reliance.”

    “I am nurtured from within. Divine Mother loves me.”

    “I hold sacred the Divinity within all Life.”

    “I am a beloved child of the Universe. I am grateful for its love and support.”

    “I am filled with the strength and courage to creatively express who I truly am.”

    “I feel the warmth of well-being within my heart as I allow my spirits to rise.”

    “Sweetness and Light fill my heart and soul.”

    “I am a radiant beam of Light shining from the heart of the Universe.”

    “I am blessed with a strong and powerful aura.”

    “I love to play!”

  8. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:32

    People will forget what you said.
    People will forget what you did.
    But people will never forget how you made them feel.

  9. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:33

    “Howard Glass” was just a game you’ve been playing for a short time. You’re in a gaming den, playing a game. It came out a little while ago and everyone went crazy over it. This game thrusts you into the consciousness of a fetal “human.” You gestate, are born, and you experience and manipulate your human life, deal with the rules of the environment, that sort of thing. Standard plot, really. But this game in particular was the first and most successful class III simulator – that is, a simulator with a psy-clouder cryptodilemma which makes you forget you’re playing a game, thereby completely engrossing you in its illusion with no imposing player ego to speak of.
    Entirely fooled.
    When the game was given to the people, several prominent philosophers tried it and then committed suicide within a month. Their death speeches all said basically the same thing;
    “If we are capable of creating artificial reality; a VR that can entirely convince consciousness, then it is probable that this reality right now is also an entirely convincing VR. And if our game ends and we wake up from this, the reality we awaken is also probably VR, and so on, and so on, ad infinitum. We must therefore conclude that any reality in which we are immersed at any given moment is most likely virtual.” Philosophers really do leave suicide notes like that. Or so you’ve been reading.
    You look around the den and laugh. What a great game. Somehow, your consciousness must have found a way to hack or subvert the psy-clouder dilemmas while in-game, and while fully clouded. You’ve been developing a genius humanoid with latent schizophrenia. You feed it a steady diet of entheogenic chemicals, called LPMT, LSD, Psilocybin, DMT and Mescaline, and existentialist word-software, called Sartre, Kierkegaard and Nietzsche, just to see what will happen. In an immersive game like this, you need to condition those choices into your habits beforehand, since your consciousness will be entirely submerged in your character, and therefore incapable of precise intervention. “Howard” is a mutated manifestation of your game-playing will… Howard is the Maya of your Lila. The power of your own consciousness to decrypt or circumvent the psy-clouder’s supposedly unresolvable dilemmas had possibly been catalyzed by the intelligence, schizophrenia, heavy entheogen use and metaphysical obsession with free will on the part of the consciousness of your character, Howard.
    Interesting.
    You see others who appear to be fully immersed in various Class II and III realities – someone you recognize is across the room playing Booju, where they’re directly experiencing what it’s like to be theoretical geometry for ten thousand years. Others play at being deepspace sentient hunterseeker viruses, silicon-based invertebrate soldiers, infinitely wise alien plant life, and so on. You check out your fellow players at the other terminals and wonder whether any of them are playing Talia, or whether Talia’s player has a higher-level player.
    Butterfly, or man?
    You shake your head in awe; cooing with delight as you eagerly replace the visor. The train scene refocuses, the psy-clouder dilemmas re-engage your reason, and the game den reality completely erases itself from your mind, forever.

  10. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:33

    Howard wondered what just happened to him. He could still clearly see the many ghosts of the Other Place and their odd mechanical devices, but he was no longer hyper-aware. He mentally backtracked… I was hyper-aware. I was itchy, I scratched my face, then I think I blacked out for a couple of minutes… He thought about it for a moment, and then, slowly, reached up to feel his face…
    Nosebleed.
    He staggered to his feet and got off at Qin, trying at first to crawl up the steep flight of stairs and failing miserably. Defeated, he slumped down against the wall where disorientation and dizziness started kicking his ass. What the fuck is going on? He couldn’t deal with the overlapping effect in this particular area at all. Everything was wrong. Nothing made any sense.
    Strange apparitions slithered along impossible vertices all around him. Suddenly, there was a crazed, grizzled face directly in front of his, yelling something out of synch with its lips and occasionally spitting tiny sparkling antigravity jewels as it hollered, “Don’t do it! Don’t figure it out! They’ll kill you if you figure it out! Don’t do it, Howard… Go back to sleep! Go back to sleep! Go back to sleep!” And as Howard’s consciousness went black from all the excitement, he lucid-dreamed that his body was glowing and losing solidity.
    Consciousness came and went. There were images of strangers in the subway station whose eyes were angry black holes; overlapped with almost-as-real cartilage aliens, who now seemed vaguely familiar, doing strange things to even stranger crypto-machines. He tried to glean the meaning of the ‘black holes for eyes’ idea, but the images of strangers grew more and more aggressive as he tried. Then he was a bright glowing liquid for a little while, and nothing made any sense, yet, accepting that, everything made perfect sense.
    Then the unspeakable happened thirty-six times per second in a circular-infinite six-second loop, forcing Howard to multithread his existence and live out nine simultaneous incarnations as monks in every Eastern pro-enlightenment discipline. By the time the first monk-Howard’s spiritual weasel went pop in Cambodia, Howards all over Southeast Asia were spontaneously rewiring their neurocircuitry in a chain reaction that drew an equilateral triangle from India, through China and Korea to Japan, through the Philippines to Indonesia, through Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand and Free Nepal back to India. The sheer magnitude of this unimaginable event tore spacetime a new asshole, and Howard broke free of the six-second loop and realized it had all been in his head.

  11. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:34

    …Her heartbeat just happened naturally, and she couldn’t control it… much. It just was, and it was doing exactly what it was meant to do with no mental interference or complication. Breathing happened naturally, but as soon as she thought about it, she would start controlling it; trying to breathe, and breathing in a naturally awkward rhythm. She paid attention to her heart, and her breathing would return to a natural rhythm. After a few moments, she got the hang of paying attention to her breathing without controlling it. Passive attentiveness. And at this point, all the stress and worry was gone. She was absolutely content in doing what she was doing at the moment. Blissful non-thinking. Sitting with silence; the emptiness out of which all sound is born. Like the sound of pounding at her door.

  12. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:35

    They will tell you that your reality is a deterministic machine. They will tell you that free will exists only as a necessary illusion to keep us from raping, destroying, killing and burning everyone and everything in sight. Their position is logically valid; maybe even sound by the cannibalistic rules of their reasoning systems, but the truth is they couldn’t have been more wrong.
    Your reality is a processed version of your consciousness; a variable reflection of those concepts and beliefs held present in consciousness during the immediate moment. Hold an idea in your conscious attention long enough and it will manifest in reality. The longer you can maintain this conscious attention, the more intensely it will manifest.
    Hold concept x in your immediate conscious attention as long as possible, as frequently as possible, and you will cause permutations and dreamlike metaphors of x to manifest in the reality which surrounds you.

    On a planet which, without consciousness, is a nearly perfect closed system, reality without consciousness is inert; static… Consciousness is necessary to introduce randomness, unpredictability and novelty into an otherwise deterministic checkmate.

  13. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:35

    Grasping nothingness has gifted me with the ability to relax and spontaneously detach from everything; to suicide my ego on a whim and to pull it back out of the nothing and reconstruct “me” from ambient memory. I am capable of a kind of mushin, complete with reset feature, and I hope to use this detachment to control the trauma inflicted by the first three hours of this amazing drug. I am about to sign off, swallow all 6, and meditate my self out of the picture. (No intellect, nothing to traumatize, I hope.)

  14. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:36

    I know this one … Howard remembered that the most frustrating metaphysical principle was that desire is inversely proportional to fulfillment – “The more you want something, the harder you push yourself away from it, and the more fervently you avoid something, the more you attract it to you.” This is directly connected to another, more popular principle, “Nature abhors a vacuum.” You can immediately have anything you don’t want, and you will attract anything you try to run from, so the answer is … turn and run.
    And so he did. He turned around to face the endless blue path into nothing and ran. He ran for so long that he eventually forgot about the temple altogether. And of course, right at that very moment, he tripped over the temple’s front steps.
    Zen logic always cheesed Howard off.

  15. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:36

    “I have taught myself skills that make me far superior to any of you pathetic anachronisms. Attack me if you want, but if you do, you’ll never learn my techniques.”

  16. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:37

    All that matters is to remain focused, tempered, autonomous and hard to kill. Infuckingtrepid.

  17. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:38

    Once upon a time,
    I, Chuang Tzu, dreamt I was a butterfly,
    fluttering hither and thither,
    to all intents and purposes,
    a butterfly.
    I was conscious only of following my fancies
    as a butterfly,
    and was unconscious
    of my individuality
    as a man.
    Suddenly, I awoke,
    and there I lay,
    myself again.
    Now I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly,
    or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man.
    *Chuang Tzu*

  18. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:38

    The secret is to go psychologically limp and not resist anything… just… be nothing but aware.
    Aware with a big fat capital A! To absolutely know and understand any concept, idea, person, place, animal, model, object, and so on, that is, to be one hundred percent aware of it – is exactly the same thing as being it. If you are 100% aware of a cup, then you are that cup. With full mastery of your awareness, you can be whatever or whomever or wherever or whenever you want. However, you must not get caught up in being any particular you, since the real you is nothing but aware.

  19. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:39

    Developing a conscious acceptance/rejection mental reflex for certain philosophical/metaphysical concepts, and possibly even perceptual stimuli, will allow a mind to willfully integrate certain concepts into its gestalt {beliefs-values-knowledge} system and force them to accommodate and reorganize accordingly, rather than allowing the existing structure to control which concepts it will accept and which concepts it will filter out. This is one of three mental reflexes fundamental to the discipline called “conscious user-reconstructive self-engineering.” I, however, regret nothing. Faust was a pussy.

  20. radioman said,

    2007/09/13 at 00:50

    To realise your dreams you must have confidence in yourself. The dreams we desire come from the confidence we have to attain them. So stand up straight and say my dreams will come true.

    Focus on what you want and see yourself having it then your dream will become reality.


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